I’m going to be a whiny bitch now.

Recently I found this very interesting painting on Deviant Art.

Moon-Eater by ~xTattooedHeart on deviantART

It reminded me of my Nova Crow work from years ago, so I favorited it and sent my kudos to the artist. She replied to tell me that she religiously followed my comics back in the day. Small world, right?

This keeps happening. I keep running into readers the older I get. And it’s bittersweet. On the one hand, I have friends wherever I go, I’m never alone, and I am only just beginning to realize the impact I made on other womens’ lives. But on the other hand, it reminds me of how much I gave up when I changed career paths, and I feel guilty for that, like I failed.

I miss drawing, and I miss my readers. I feel sometimes like a washed up child actor.

I’m still drawing, still writing, but I accept that I will probably never return to what I once was. Comics are for fun now, not for money. But that means I have less time for them.

All right, end of angstiness!

  • Rei

    Even if you could devote yourself full time to drawing and writing comics, I still don’t think you could go back to being the same as before. I’m betting a lot has changed in your life, and you’ve probably changed too. Your devoted fans love every bit that they can read, old or new, and are just want you to be happy with whatever you’re doing with your life! :)

  • http://bookspread.net Bookspread

    You are looking at it the wrong way; all the experiences that you have had besides comics has given you more material to draw comics. Which might become again your Plan A, because your ideas from 5 years ago are still fresh and eye-opening, and I bet that your art has just gotten better.

  • http://xtattooedheart.deviantart.com xTattooedHeart

    I totally have to agree with the above comment! All I currently do is art related and that takes up pretty much all of my time. I would love to do real life based comics, but I pretty much have no material xD ! It would just be one of those endless images-inside-images of me drawing me drawing me drawing me drawing me… Aauugh!
    Your comics have stuck with me through the years. It was obvious back then and still is that you love drawing them! If inspiration strikes and you find the time to draw more, know that you’re fans will be here to enjoy what you have to share. Otherwise I know I’ll be rereading your older stuff and enjoying them just as much as I had way back when <3

  • Anon

    I wouldn’t say that you failed. It’s disappointing that you couldn’t continue to pursue what you loved doing, but you had to make a change in your life for the better.

    There may be a time in the future where you are able to go back to your comics full time, but no matter what you should be proud of what you did while you could.